The Week In Geek: 3/4/17

So, this week in Star Wars, as if the cast for the Han Solo movie wasn’t already cartoonishly awesome, Michael K. Williams (Omar from The Wire) has officially been added to the cast. I don’t know how big his role is. I don’t know what character he’s playing. As far as I’m concerned, he could reprieve his old role as Omar from The Wire and my ticket would still be guaranteed bought. I love that we’re getting so much Star Wars content out of this run. I would be in Heaven if we could get a non episodic movie in between every episode. We’re at a point where the budget and the technology exists to send this franchise in so many different directions. The official episodes represent the “space drama” and Rogue One had the feel of a “greatest generation” war movie that showed a more visceral, ground level side of this conflict. We don’t know much about the Han Solo movie but I could totally envision this being a space caper film. Either way, my ticket is bought so that’s that.

In other geeky ass news, nobody really knows for sure what’s going on with Tron. A few years ago, we production for Tron 3 got cancelled. I’m assuming Disney put the brakes on it to pay for all these Marvel movies being relentlessly pumped out (not that I’m complaining about more Marvel but TRON) on top of liberating Star Wars from George Lucas’ wooden ass dialogue. Since then, there have been rumors that more Tron might still get made. Hell, Tron Legacy director Joseph Kosinski even gave us some insight into what Tron: Ascension would have been (or might still be about). Now, according to The Hollywood Reporter, Disney might be looking to reboot Tron all together….with Jared Leto at the center of it. There is virtually no version of me throughout the multiverse that could be convinced to not watch a Tron movie. If the only thing standing between me and my seat in a movie theater to watch a Tron movie were a dozen heavyweight MMA fighters, I guarantee they’d all end up on their asses. No amount of anything could keep my nerdy black ass out of the seat for a Tron movie….except maybe Jared Leto, the dude who took his role as the Joker so seriously, he showed up to a hospital in full Joker garb with a tarantula on his face, scaring the shit out of terminally ill children. But the idea of a reboot isn’t terrible. I’m really excited about what Kosinski had in mind for Tron 3, but even as a Tron fanatic, I realize that a lot of time has passed and it’s not unreasonable for a studio to want to just start over. If that’s what it takes to get these light cycles back in effect, so be it. I just wouldn’t count on seeing it until a few years after the Avengers defeat Thanos.

My comic review for Star Wars is available on Black Nerd Problems for your viewing enjoyment and don’t forget about Chapter 2 of Neverland: The Untold

Dear Logan: Thanks But No Thanks

Since I’ve been away working on other projects, one of the main things I’ve had people asking me about is the Logan, Fox’s final attempt at making a respectable Wolverine movie (since Hugh Jackman is finally tapping out after playing Wolverine for 17 years...feel old yet?). What do I think? Am I going to go see it? Does it look like it’s any good to me?

No. I’m not going to see it. Well...I’m not going to spend money on it.

Yes, I see that it’s rated R since (in the wake of Deadpool’s success) Fox has decided that the problem with their movies is that there isn’t enough blood and cursing. Yes, I see that they’re borrowing bits and pieces from the Old Man Logan graphic novel. And yes, I see that it’s gritty and Wolverine’s all bloody and explosions and desert and X-23’s in it.

The problem is that these Wolverine movies are like a terrible ex lover that keeps coming back, telling you it’s going to be different this time. They show up at your door with a different haircut, better clothes, a new job and they don’t smell like cigarettes and whiskey anymore. They even talk a little different, remembering everything you like. They spend a few minutes convincing you of how aware they are that they fucked up their last two chances with you. They swear up and down that if they had their chance they’d show you just how much they’d appreciate you. Then you let them in just a little bit for “just one drink”. The next thing you know, you’re alone at the bar while they’re in the entirely too small bathroom in the pub next door, going down on your best friend (terribly, by the way). That’s what these Wolverine movies are. They promise that the new one isn't going to be like the last one and oftentimes, it's not, but that doesn't stop it from being worse.

Maybe it’ll be fantastic. Maybe Fox has truly gotten its shit together. Maybe this will be the thing that turns the X-franchise around for the better. Hell, maybe we should just be happy Hugh Jackman is getting one last enormous check out of this shit sandwich. Maybe things’ll get better when they reboot and get wooden ass Sam Worthington to start playing Wolverine.

Either way...I’m pretty sure I’m not ready to love again. I’ve been hurt before. Also, my review of The Mighty Thor is up and available on Black Nerd Problems for your viewing enjoyment.

My GAWD, Shame On Me For Not Talking About Westworld

Originally, I was going to do a post about the current state of The Walking Dead, but there’s probably nothing new I can add to that conversation other than the fact that this season is probably the most divisive I’ve ever seen among fans. 

Then, I was going to do a post outlining each part of the yearly Arrowverse crossover which now includes four separate shows, two and a half of which are particularly terrible. However, I could only sit through two episodes and it doesn’t feel right railing on a story when it’s entirely feasible (but probably not) that the conclusion featured in Legends of Tomorrow could have turned things around and made this event tolerable. So we’ll mark that as “to be continued.” 

Then I was going to update you about how Civil War II is going, but I don’t think anyone will be surprised to know that it’s still pimpled butt cheeks. The past three issues have been going over the same three points over and over: 1). Captain Marvel is strong and wrong; 2). The young heroes are sick of the old heroes and their shit and 3). Spider Man really doesn’t want to go to jail. So yeah, still awful.

And then I realized that while I’ve been looking one way, HBO’s sci-fi mind bender, Westworld has been low key becoming the best show on television. It hits all the obligatory markers of an HBO show….obscene budget, brilliant A list casting, first class writing. Clearly, the network is aiming for this to be the successor to the crown currently occupied by Game of Thrones which is officially on its way out. But the show goes a little further than that, ambitiously reaching past the story’s roots from the Michael Crichton movie. 

There are spoilers after this point. They are really MINOR spoilers but I'm still obligated (by the fact that I don't want to hear whining about spoilers) to tell you that there are spoilers after the jump. That's four times I've mentioned spoilers. Five now. So I don't want to hear any bullshit about it.

Night of the Awful Slavery/Zombie Episode.....

So, you’ll notice one comic related show I never talk about is Legends of Tomorrow. It’s not because I don’t find time to watch it or because I ration out my television time among select shows. It’s because, last I checked, Legends of Tomorrow was a generally terrible show. Of all the shows that make up CW’s Arrowverse, Legends is the one that most resembles Fox’s approach towards the X-Men movies. Take a few fan favorite characters, some good looking actors, a nerdy premise, shake well and the result is….well...a fucking mess.

For those of you that had the good sense to skip the show up to now, there are people out there fucking up space and time for various and sometimes, undefined reasons. So, the Doctor Rip Hunter went against the wishes of the Time Masters Lords came to the present day to ask Oliver Queen and Barry Allen to vouch for him so he could recruit a team of misfits including Firestorm, Heatwave and Not Quite Tony Stark the Atom. They call themselves the Legends (despite this being among the silliest team names of all time). So, this is the part where I go into a recap of the worst episode of anything I've watched in at least the past two months. There are spoilers, so if you're brave enough to still watch this horseshit after said recap, just know that there are spoilers after the jump.

Update: Arrow is Still Trash

Since I haven’t done a post in a while, I might as well check back in with comic based television. I know I said I was done with Arrow last season, but after seeing the trailer for the new season, I got curious as to where they were headed. The result is my first real hate-watch since Smallville. I mean….there are just so many bad things taking place, but the small handful of good things keep me interested in how they’re going to maintain them.

First off, I talked about this before but the whole thing with Oliver Queen maybe/maybe not doing murder is just getting silly. The whole point of a superhero is that they stand on a very basic code of morals, whatever that code may be. It’s hard to know if you’re the kind of superhero these people want to stand behind if that code is changing from season to season. If the writers are going to be so deadset on modeling the Green Arrow after Batman, he’s gotta be less indecisive than that.

And this whole Arrow Academy storyline wavers between “trash” and “kinda tolerable fan service.” And the main problem isn’t that the new team is garbage (although the new team IS garbage); it’s that the only reason there’s a new team is because the writers realized they’ve written all of the old team into a corner. Diggle has fallen so far from awesomeness, he had to run off to the Army just to have a sense of identity. A SUPERHERO had to quit superheroing and rejoin the Army just to feel like somebody. That’s a problem. Meanwhile, Ollie’s sister, Thea has quit being Speedy/Red Arrow to join her brother in politics just to have a credible storyline that isn’t focused on either a). her daddy issues or b). her consistently terrible choices in boyfriends. And Felicity is sick of being Oliver’s enabler even though she stuck around to continue serving as Oliver’s enabler. Because make no mistake, one of the primary reasons that the Green Arrow is an asshole is because Felicity spent four seasons telling him that his best, most dickish self is the key to beating the bad guys. Granted, this week’s episode was probably the best one thus far simply because the scene of Team Arrow assembling was epic (not to mention Stephen Amell settling his wrestling beef yet again with Cory “Stardust” Rhodes who played the villain of the week).

The problem with this show digging so hard into the Batman well is that Batman doesn’t work in a weekly CW show. Batman works well in comics and movies because either you’re not reminded constantly of what an irredeemable douche he is.

In any case, the show is probably going to crawl along on this redemption run until the Green Arrow finally throws down with Prometheus because there’s only room for one Impossible White Man in Star City. But for the most part, it feels like the show is trying so hard to gain its viewers trust back, it's just a reminder of how much they've fucked up.

How the Village Failed David Walker

So, recently, David Walker announced on Facebook that Marvel had left his Nighthawk series out of the November solicitations….meaning it was being canceled. Walker went on to soothe his savage fans (this includes myself), being as candid and classy about the whole thing as he could. After all, he still has his Luke Cage and Iron Fist series as well as the upcoming Occupy Avengers, so I'm sure he's not crying himself to sleep. Honestly, this is why I don’t take the complaints about blackwashing characters seriously.

Fans will whine and cry and moan about how the Big Two should focus on building up existing characters of color or creating new characters instead of having them take up the monikers of white heroes. And sure, this is valid but the problem here is that when the industry listens to the audience and gives us what we want, nobody buys it. This has been the case with Static Shock, Mister Terrific, Deathlok, Black Panther: Man Without Fear (though that last one was probably canceled more because it was meh) and the list goes on.

Nighthawk was essentially every single thing the audience has been calling for. Walker delivered an honest, upfront, challenging book that dusted off a black character that people really enjoyed from Supreme Power/Squadron Supreme. I mean, a Batman analog beating the shit out of corrupt cops in Chicago? That’s worth its weight in vibranium. And David Walker is a solid, prolific writer, so you can’t really say that Marvel didn’t put quality talent into it. We let books go to the wayside and then complain that we’re not getting what we want. We can’t have it both ways. At some point, a company (because it’s not unreasonable for Marvel to want to make money) is eventually going to go with what makes money and if that means the Falcon gets to be Captain America (which makes more sense than detractors are willing to admit) or that Kamala Khan gets to take Carol Danvers’ old name (in an Eisner award winning book, by the way), so be it. Meanwhile, if you want to whine about Marvel not being original, sure, that argument can be had. But if you’re going to complain, you have to at least meet the industry half way when they actually make a consorted effort to give you what you want. It takes a village to raise our own heroes up, but when we let decent material pass us by after complaining that it doesn't exist, I wonder if there was ever a village to begin with. Just thinking out loud. My review on the finale of Tokyo Ghost is available on Black Nerd Problems for your viewing enjoyment. And don't forget about my webcomic collaboration with Katie Coats, Neverland: The Untold as well

My Review of The Get Down

This is my review of the Get Down. There will be spoilers so if you haven't watched the Part One of Season One of The Get Down, here is your stop. For everyone else, proceed to reading after the jump.