A Black Panther Movie Isn't That Hard

So, with Marvel's Movie Machine reaching optimum levels as far as production quality and with Guardians of the Galaxy, a previously unknown franchise to fans, getting rave reviews all across the board, the big question being asked is "Who's next?" And it makes sense. After all, it seemed like Marvel was betting it all on introducing a set number of heroes and building the universe specifically around them (though, in fairness, it's arguable that Iron Man was in the Guardians' position until six years ago). Now, that they've proven that they can make quality product while still taking a degree of risk on characters, it's only reasonable that fanboys would be even more eager their respective favorites to get a turn at bat.

With all that said....Black Panther.

This is that one movie Kevin Feige swears to the Old Gods and the New is in development almost annually at this point. And a lot people got their mouths watering after a proposed release schedule for the next five years of Marvel movies was spread across the internet, but that was proven to be fan-made shenanigans. Allegedly, there is a script and an active casting call in the works, but at this point, fans will probably only believe it when they see it. With that in mind, there are a handful of things that a good Black Panther movie needs to have.

1). Strong Black Women: Wakanda is supposed to be a technologically advanced society apart from the rest of Africa and, ultimately, the world. It should also be culturally advanced. Most incarnations of Black Panther depict the fictional country as thumbing its nose at the worst parts of Western culture on every level. A big one the movie should highlight is its treatment of women. Now, granted....with Fox not letting go of the X-Men rights anytime soon (even though Marvel could totally shoehorn her in on the technicality that Storm was once an Avenger) the chances of us seeing a budding romance between T'Challa and Storm are about as likely as Ron Paul ever being President. But there's still no shortage of tough women at Panther's side. His sister, Shuri almost definitely has to play a big role. I would run include a few fantastic scenes of her acting impulsively, leaping headfirst out of jet (like Captain America, making it another snub at the West), leading an attack against someone like the Rhino. It would be somewhat reminiscent of the rhino scene in 300. This would also be an opportunity to outdo Sony's Paul Giamatti Rhino the way they're outdoing Fox's Quicksilver. I suppose you could go with the Dora Milaje, T'Challa's official bodyguards/wives-in-training, but they have to get rid of the "wives in training" part because that sounds way too much like "concubines."

2). African Actors: Let's face it, guys. Halle Berry as Storm (even though the writers and wigmakers also deserve equal blame) was the best possible example of selecting a high profile Black name for a character of color as opposed to actual casting. And the reactions to the NWA cast list and Zoe Saldana playing Nina Simone should be enough evidence to Hollywood that "close enough" is not a great way to go about casting characters of color. There's basically no downside to getting African actors to play characters that live in Africa. I would say this shouldn't have to be said, but the MENSA candidate that made Prometheus has proven me wrong. This is an opportunity for Marvel to show some real understanding of what representation on the big screen would mean to little black kids. Speaking of which....

3). Djimon Hounsou: Good looking, charismatic, talented actor, physically imposing enough to probably break my 6'4, 250 pound ass in half. So, here's a guy who was basically the perfect person to play the Black Panther. Ten years ago. Although he voiced the titular character in the short lived, kinda-sorta-didn't-get-off-the-ground cartoon series, time was our enemy in getting the Gladiator star in the costume. Still, I could totally see Hounsou playing T'Chaka, Panther's father who was assassinated by Ulysses Klaw, via flashbacks. It would show some respect towards the fact that there have been attempts over the years to establish BP as a marquee character.

4). Wakanda As A Strong Nation: I know this is something else that really shouldn't have to be said, but truthfully, I know Marvel, with how awesome their recent offerings have been, probably has the strong urge to have Wakanda seem awesome....but not as awesome as Captain America. But here's the thing. I know Disney isn't likely to be down for a story where America is portrayed as being slightly sinister, so I'm not suggesting a movie where Wakanda takes an "Us vs. Them" narrative (even though that's exactly how Wakanda is in the comics), but I wouldn't mind seeing Reginald Hudlin's "Captain America Visited Here Once And Was Promptly Thrown Out On His Ass Because Fuck White Saviors" flashback played out on screen. Marvel has already been praised for allowing Kelly Sue DeConnick to play around with the turning the White Savior narrative on its ear, so this is a no-brainer for them, really. In the comics, while the rest of the world was being infiltrated by shape shifting alien zealots, this is a nation that sent them packing to say the least.

5). A Strong Focus On Establishing It's Own Franchise: This is an easy one. It doesn't even need to be an origin story. The first movie, Klaw killed T'Challa's dad (5 minute flashback at the beginning) and, as the King of Wakanda years later, Panther has become even more obsessed than ever with tracking him down and bringing him to justice. But Shuri and his council notice it's putting him off his game as a ruler, causing him to turn a blind eye to his elite police, lead by the White Wolf (T'Challa's adoptive older brother), using aggressive tactics to root out Western spies and other outside threats. As it turns out, the Wolf is working with Klaw to orchestrate an uprising among the people. Allude to the coming of Klaw in a sequel through a couple of faint appearances a la Thanos in Guardians.

In truth, a Black Panther movie really shouldn't be all that hard. If we can get Ant-Man and Rocket Raccoon and Loki reincarnated into a lovable little scamp of a supervilliain, I think Marvel can make this happen. Then again, I could be wrong.

Stuff I Read This Week 3/19 (Ladies First Edition)

X-Men #12: So, this title has spent a year benefiting from Brian Wood's "girl power" themed take on Marvel's mutants. They've done everything from alien possessed cyborgs and surrogate mothers to revamping Generation X characters (I did not think that shit was possible). And this current arc, in which the X-Gals take on Lady Deathstrike's newly formed "Sisterhood" has been shaping up quite nicely.

Too bad it didn't end on a very exciting note. Issue #12 features our heroines looking for a taste of retribution for Arkea's Sisterhood kicking their teeth in. I would have almost felt better if it had ended in a standard mutant slugfest, but (spoiler alert...I honestly don't even feel bad about this one, by the way) even that concluded with certain Sisterhood members just looking at each other and saying "Oh, fuck this. I'm out." If the villains were going to crumble, it would have been nice to at least see a failed attempt at teamwork or something. Alas, we got three underwhelming rounds of "Bad Guys unite....Kick the Good Guys' X-asses....Good Guys come back to kick Bad Guys' asses....The End."

The upside was mainly Kris Anka's divinely kinetic artwork. This book seems to play Musical Chairs dealing out its art duties, but Anka has certainly dealt some of the most awesome action panels of Wood's run thus far. Watching Monet pull a Sentry and cannonball through a building to take the Enchantress to the woodshed was a thing of beauty, worthy of and old school church shout.

Bottom Line: Much like Idris Elba in Ghost Rider....even top notch art can't save paint-by-numbers conclusion. 6 out of 10


Ms. Marvel #2: G. Willow Wilson is a godsend to comics for the work she's done thus far on this book. Introducing a brand new face to a well known superhero moniker is always a risky prospect. However, in adding a new layer to the legacy of Ms. Marvel, Wilson has brought a much needed dimension to the Marvel Universe.

This second issue manages to set two very special tones for the book going forward. The lion's share is dedicated to Kamala Khan exploring her newfound shapeshifting abilities with mixed success. What makes this origin slightly different is that it doesn't come across as polished as what we're used to. More often than not, when a hero discovers they have superpowers, it's usually not the toughest ordeal to learn how to use them because....well, we want to see them getting to the asskickery, right? Here we see our hero, via internal narrative, going through the inner workings of shapeshifting and testing herself in a fix-on-fail basis. (By the way, I want her "Embiggen" battle cry on a shirt.) However, depicting the discovery of Kamala's powers, Wilson also delves into the character's psyche. When she goes into "hero" mode, she almost becomes an avatar of what she envisions her heroic self as much like Neo's "digital self" being without plugs all over his body in The Matrix. But her hair turns blonde, her skin turns light. In other words, she becomes a white woman. But being "someone cool", as she perceives such things, turns out not to be an escapist fantasy. It's fucking scary.

Adrian Alphona's lighter color scheme works well for this book, making seem almost as if the whole thing is happening in Kamala's head when she uses her powers. Scenes where her transformations are incomplete and uncontrollable fit perfectly into the tone Wilson is conveying. The expressive faces and, at times, awkward stances are appropriate for what is, on many levels, less of a hero origin and more of a coming of age tale.

Bottom Line: This book is shaping up to be a master class in dealing with race and identity and everyone....every actual person who reads comics....should be reading this. 9.5 out of 10

The Cyborg Problem

Some of you...many of you, I wager...have probably noticed my Facebook and Twitter pages have lately been full of Cyborg "shade" and wondered why I have it out for this character in particular.

I went to sleep to @letsgetfree13 shading Cyborg & I woke up to the same. This may have been one if the best follows I've made recently.
— Felonious Donk (@PhaxSimile) March 2, 2014

Well, I was with some friends a week or two ago watching Justice League: War, DC's latest bastardization of their New 52 material. I'm not going to into why I didn't particularly enjoy the movie or the source material it was based on. That's a whole other post. I mentioned how I didn't like Cyborg being placed on the Justice League roster for one simple reason.

Cyborg is the epitome of why DC's black characters (except Green Lantern John Stewart) just don't work.

Let's take a real look at Victor Stone. There's not much to set him apart from anyone else in the Justice League. Think about it. What exactly can he do that the League needs that any of the other members can't already do? Strength? Well, that's pretty notably what Superman and Wonder Woman are for. He has a laser cannon for an arm? Green Lantern's magic wishing ring can do that plus anything else he can imagine. He can hack into computer security systems? Let's face it. DC has made Batman so annoyingly omniscient, he can hack/break/punch/think his way into virtually ANYTHING on Earth. Flash, Aquaman and even Shazam have villains tailor made to combat them and offer a significant challenge to be overcome. Name a Cyborg villain. I'll wait.

The ONLY thing that actually makes Cyborg stand out is being black. Now, let's look at his actual character development. Thus far, in the New 52 continuity, the only defining personality trait anyone can nail down is "I'm so sad that I have a metal face." Granted, tragedy isn't a new plot device or anything. After all....Batman. But there are other layers to Batman. He's meticulous, calculating, disgustingly rich, gets laid on Earth more than Captain Kirk ever did in space. Despite being a well documented loner...he's kind of a surrogate father, too. Cyborg is just really, really sad about his metal face despite being having all kinds of cool superpowers. I'm not even going to go into the possible undertones that could be assumed about the fact that only thing DC seems to be able to do remotely well with black characters is tragedy.

(This was the same problem DC had with Hal Jordan in the Green Lantern movie. These are sad times. People are sick, people are broke and someone's trying to shoot up a school or shopping mall every other week. If you have a character with a magic wishing ring or super robot powers, nobody wants to read them whining about it for 26 pages.)

With all that in mind, I repeat: the ONLY thing that separates Cyborg from the rest of the Justice League is the fact that he's black. So, when they put him on the roster, it's blatantly DC coming across as stuffy old white guys trying to condescend to readers, showing them how "down" they are by putting putting a black person with no standout qualities other than blackness next to Superman. Remind you of anyone?

Yes, that's right. Cyborg is quite literally DC's "black friend."

The sad thing is they really do mean well. It seems like they're trying to do for Cyborg what Marvel did with Luke Cage in 2000 by upgrading his character from the superhero version of Chef in South Park to what has basically turned out to be Shaft with superpowers (if he were played by Ving Rhames ten years ago). The only problem with that is Marvel does shit like that well.

Before ever becoming an Avenger, we saw Cage evolve and shine in top notch books like Alias and Daredevil (it probably helped that Brian Michael Bendis has sort of a man crush on Luke Cage). I know Luke Cage. He's is the summation of guys like my best friend and my father, an old school man of stoic conscience with pretty old school methods to superheroing and isn't always entirely sure he's supposed to be a husband and father, but sucks it up and does it anyway.

For all the complaints about her being underused (even though she's at the forefront of at least two successful X-Men titles I can think of), Storm is a pretty fleshed out character herself. She's a woman who owns her mutant powers and has always sort carried herself like royalty even before marrying (and divorcing) the Black Panther. Her history is so extensive, we've seen her overcome claustrophobia. Whether you like her character or not, you know Storm. You can repeat this with Black Nick Fury, James Rhodes, even the Falcon at this point, really.

Now, name three personality traits, defining moments or quirks about Cyborg, Mister Terrific, Black Lightning, Bronze Tiger or Aqualad (who, in fairness, was AWESOME in Young Justice). Villains? Motivations? Memorable "Real Hero" moments? Go ahead. Try. I'll wait.

Putting black characters like this on a Justice League roster for black's sake isn't giving them the respect or recognition they deserve. Taking them seriously and actually writing them is. That's why I don't take Cyborg seriously. Then again, I could be wrong.

(By the way, I've left John Stewart and Static...and even Static's cartoon got a little condescending...out of my analysis because those were two characters made awesome ONLY because of the late Dwayne McDuffie, who took advantage of post 9/11 sentiments by focusing on John Stewart's military background, almost making it a superpower in itself.)