Ok, after tearing through DC’s 52 “first issues”, I’m not going to bother giving you the rundown on every single one simply because some of them don’t need to be dignified with an explanation. Basically, this rundown consists of my passing students (though scores will vary) and my failing students. Some titles in the passing class have been granted some amnesty because I predict they may get a little better over time. These are the titles that made the cut for what I’ll be picking up this month…..
Animal Man: I wanted to give this one points off for Buddy’s new costume (he looks like Justice), but I couldn’t do it. This was a fantastic, well paced, beautifully drawn tale of guy who does the superhero thing every now and then with an ending that left us a little freaked out. 9 out of 10
Animal Man: I wanted to give this one points off for Buddy’s new costume (he looks like Justice), but I couldn’t do it. This was a fantastic, well paced, beautifully drawn tale of guy who does the superhero thing every now and then with an ending that left us a little freaked out. 9 out of 10
Action Comics: **see my review blog** 8 out of 10.
Swamp Thing: One of the upside about this reboot is that DC is giving their non superhero genres a little more love while doing a decent job of making sure they’re properly infused into the larger universe. Also, I have yet to read a Scott Snyder project I didn’t like (he hit another home run I’m going to talk about later). He does a masterful job here of reminding us that Swamp Thing, at its roots, is a horror story. Though much of this first issue was devoted to setup as it should be, it also did a really good job of creeping me out at one point which is difficult to do. 8.5 out of 10.
Swamp Thing: One of the upside about this reboot is that DC is giving their non superhero genres a little more love while doing a decent job of making sure they’re properly infused into the larger universe. Also, I have yet to read a Scott Snyder project I didn’t like (he hit another home run I’m going to talk about later). He does a masterful job here of reminding us that Swamp Thing, at its roots, is a horror story. Though much of this first issue was devoted to setup as it should be, it also did a really good job of creeping me out at one point which is difficult to do. 8.5 out of 10.
Aquaman: I was skeptical of the project because Geoff Johns was involved in it and I’m still trying to forgive him for being a part of what passed for a Green Lantern movie (I’ve been attempting to convince myself it was a group hallucination), but this particular title was a pretty damn good example of what a #1 relaunch comic is supposed to be about. It was a very good choice to approach the character by addressing the constant ridicule he’s received over the years with a priceless diner scene. I’ll be looking forward to seeing where this goes. 8.5 out of 10.
Blackhawks: G.I. Joe for the DC Universe? That’s a good concept. It didn’t set up any particular characters other than Kunoichi very well (which is a problem when there are SO many characters to keep up with) but it was dumb fun with some good action. 6.5 out of 10.
I, Vampire: When I heard DC was pumping out a bloodsucker title, I wasn’t happy because I hate it when comic pander to the Twilight fans (sorry, ladies…It’s Vampire Academy with more whining) but I’m actually happy to report that this title did NOTHING to accomplish that goal. It actually did all in its power not to accomplish that goal. The art reminiscent of Jae Lee’s work on Dark Tower helps to make this an eerie yet beautiful story. A vampire hunting vampire looking to kill his vampire girlfriend before she and her undead legion can wage war on the DC universe??? Yes, please!!! 9.5 out of 10.
All Star Western: Granted, it wasn’t the most western book I’ve ever read, but I do love this team up between Jonah Hex and Amadeus Arkham. Arkham’s psychoanalysis of Hex doubling as narration (entertaining though slightly excessive at moments) succeeded in carrying the story. Also, any time Jonah Hex goes beating the shit out everything that moves, it’s usually a good read, so I’m in for the ride. 8 out of 10.
Teen Titans: If any book needed to turn things around, it was this rotting corpse…and they did so…to a degree. I’ve always liked Scott Lobdell, but he was trying really hard to invoke Brian Michael Bendis and the art left something to be desired in the way of facial expressions. Be that as it may, the kinetic pacing of the action and the decent setup kept me around. Also, this title did something I was convinced no comic book could ever do: it made me like Tim Drake as Red Robin. 7 out of 10.
Batman: Scott Snyder hit yet another one right out of the park with this one. I really appreciate the fact that he values the fact that Batman is a detective just as much as every other writer seems to value Batman’s ability to beat every living creature on Earth in the face. 8 out of 10.
Frankenstein, Agent of S.H.A.D.E.: Are you serious??? Frankenstein with a gun and a sword beating the hell out of demons??? How could that possibly NOT be awesome??? It was a really fun book and it’s probably the only time I’ve ever liked ANYTHING that had a warrior mummy in it. 8 out of 10.
Justice League (added by request): I wrote a review for this one that I suggest you give a look, but for a whole issue of Batman and Green Lantern in a macho scowling/snarking contest, it did okay. I'm giving it one more chance, but Geoff Johns will have to step his game up. 7.5 out of 10.
Now, here are the books I won’t bother picking up (and neither should you)….
Frankenstein, Agent of S.H.A.D.E.: Are you serious??? Frankenstein with a gun and a sword beating the hell out of demons??? How could that possibly NOT be awesome??? It was a really fun book and it’s probably the only time I’ve ever liked ANYTHING that had a warrior mummy in it. 8 out of 10.
Justice League (added by request): I wrote a review for this one that I suggest you give a look, but for a whole issue of Batman and Green Lantern in a macho scowling/snarking contest, it did okay. I'm giving it one more chance, but Geoff Johns will have to step his game up. 7.5 out of 10.
Now, here are the books I won’t bother picking up (and neither should you)….
Stormwatch: **see my review blog** 6.5 out of 10.
Batgirl: Gail Simone is usually a winner with stuff like this, but this book was boring. There was way too much narration, the cliffhanger ending was silly and nobody told the new villain that his theme was already taken and that Mirror Master will beat him with his own eyeball (because you don’t fuck with anyone who gets beaten up by The Flash on a daily basis; they have anger issues). This one won’t last through February. 6 out of 10.
Justice League International: This is a fine example of what it looks like when a C-Team is just going through their C-Team motions. And the writer doesn’t try, at any point, to convince you that these oddballs will ever be anything other than a C-Team that Batman hangs out with on Thursdays when he needs to feel more superior than usual. I mean, seriously….there’s a character named Godiva. I think that alone says enough….5.5 out of 10.
Catwoman: This is what happens when Maxim Magazine gets into comics. There was decent action here, so I wanted to like this book, but this definitely wins my award for Most Oversexed Title of the year. Granted, this is a character that has rarely been known for her modesty, but even at that....this was a ridiculous amount of T&A. She spent anywhere from 50 to 70 percent of the book either in fetish outfits or halfway out of her clothes. Then, to top it all off, the cliffhanger ending is her and Batman....fucking....in costume. If I were 12 years old and I'd never seen Baywatch before, I'd probably like this book. 6 out of 10.
Hawk and Dove: Two words… Rob. Liefeld. This doesn’t even deserve a score.
Red Lanterns: I want to find these mysterious (probably nonexistent) fanboys who were just sitting around after Blackest Night saying to themselves “I wonder what Atrocitus is up to.” I want to find them and beat them with a rolled up copy of this book. I mean, come on…there’s a kitty cat that’s a Red Lantern. Not a talking kitty cat or a kitty cat that turns into a humanoid/kitty cat version of Guy Gardner…just a mangy fucking cat. And then Atrocitus catches Geoff Johns’ Explainer’s Disease before going into panel after panel about why he’s so pissed off. I don’t know anything about any of these characters and I don’t especially care. Put simply, this is probably the most unnecessary you could ever pick up. 5 out of 10.
Batgirl: Gail Simone is usually a winner with stuff like this, but this book was boring. There was way too much narration, the cliffhanger ending was silly and nobody told the new villain that his theme was already taken and that Mirror Master will beat him with his own eyeball (because you don’t fuck with anyone who gets beaten up by The Flash on a daily basis; they have anger issues). This one won’t last through February. 6 out of 10.
Justice League International: This is a fine example of what it looks like when a C-Team is just going through their C-Team motions. And the writer doesn’t try, at any point, to convince you that these oddballs will ever be anything other than a C-Team that Batman hangs out with on Thursdays when he needs to feel more superior than usual. I mean, seriously….there’s a character named Godiva. I think that alone says enough….5.5 out of 10.
Catwoman: This is what happens when Maxim Magazine gets into comics. There was decent action here, so I wanted to like this book, but this definitely wins my award for Most Oversexed Title of the year. Granted, this is a character that has rarely been known for her modesty, but even at that....this was a ridiculous amount of T&A. She spent anywhere from 50 to 70 percent of the book either in fetish outfits or halfway out of her clothes. Then, to top it all off, the cliffhanger ending is her and Batman....fucking....in costume. If I were 12 years old and I'd never seen Baywatch before, I'd probably like this book. 6 out of 10.
Hawk and Dove: Two words… Rob. Liefeld. This doesn’t even deserve a score.
Red Lanterns: I want to find these mysterious (probably nonexistent) fanboys who were just sitting around after Blackest Night saying to themselves “I wonder what Atrocitus is up to.” I want to find them and beat them with a rolled up copy of this book. I mean, come on…there’s a kitty cat that’s a Red Lantern. Not a talking kitty cat or a kitty cat that turns into a humanoid/kitty cat version of Guy Gardner…just a mangy fucking cat. And then Atrocitus catches Geoff Johns’ Explainer’s Disease before going into panel after panel about why he’s so pissed off. I don’t know anything about any of these characters and I don’t especially care. Put simply, this is probably the most unnecessary you could ever pick up. 5 out of 10.
Deathstroke: Apparently, Deathstroke is a bad motherfucker. You know how I know? Because every other character in the fucking book went into “holy shit…here comes trouble” mode when he steps into a room. You know how else I know? Because he jumped onto a plane, took a briefcase, listened to an evil genius set up the coming story arc, and jumped off the plane. Oh yeah…and he killed a few people. Yes, that was badass. I wouldn’t want to mess with him…or this book. 4 out of 10.
Grifter: **sigh** His name is Cole Cash. That sounds like a nickname Drake makes women call him during sex. So, basically Sawyer from Lost gets into a fight on a plane, he makes a deal that goes wrong, people want to kill him, his girlfriend’s a bitch….so he puts on a mask. Sound good? I didn’t think so. 4 out of 10.
Detective Comics: Batman’s chasing the Joker. The Joker’s crazy, but some guy thinks he can out-crazy the Joker. It’s been done…a lot. 6 out of 10 (I’m being kinda nice because I liked the little twist at the end).
Wonder Woman: I'm sure this'll be a decent graphic novel once the story arc wraps up, but as it stands, Brian Azzarello wrote an incoherent clusterfuck that doesn't bother introducing anyone including it's title character which I would think is important. 6.5 out of 10.
Wonder Woman: I'm sure this'll be a decent graphic novel once the story arc wraps up, but as it stands, Brian Azzarello wrote an incoherent clusterfuck that doesn't bother introducing anyone including it's title character which I would think is important. 6.5 out of 10.
First and foremost the only time Hawk and dove is awesome is when they were voiced by Fred savage and that other guy from the wonder years. Who the hell even knew about them? Aquaman was awesome. I stopped and read that one twice. I have not read a few of the others but that I vampire is lookin kinda awesome.
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