Stuff I Read This Week Episode 29 or It Was Inevitable That Sheldon Cooper Would Become A Comic Character....

Superior Spider Man #19: Despite my numerous declarations that Superior Spider-Man sucks, I have to hand it to Dan Slott. The past few issues have been particularly awesome. The best thing Slott could do with this book is take a break from focusing on Doctor Spiderpus' champion level douchebaggery and do something heroic. The second best thing he could have done was resurrect Michael O'Mara, the 2099 Spider-Man for a good old showdown.

Having said that, it wasn't much of a showdown. In fact, you would think these two would have had much more to talk about even if it was in the middle of all time and space becoming unraveled (or whatever the actual conflict was in this story). Also, being from the future, why doesn't Future Spider-Man know that Peter Parker isn't really Peter Parker if all of this has already happened? In fact, the whole resolution to this time crisis seemed a bit anti-climatic, essentially giving Doctor Octopus another stage where he can call everyone inferior. The spiel has gone from Spider-Man being a weird mix of Batman and Sheldon Cooper to just outright being Doctor Doom in a different outfit. There are a couple of scenes where Spider-Man declares his unrivaled intellect and it just leaves you groaning "Oh, for fuck's sake, man." The great thing about Spider-Man has always been that he's semi-relatable and, despite him being a flawed character, you could see yourself having a beer with the guy. If you knew someone like Doctor Spiderpus in real life, you'd have pushed him down a flight of stairs or eaten the lo mein he kept in the fridge at work. I understand that Tony Stark and Spider Jerusalem prove there's a market for charming, douchebag do-gooders, but I don't see the point in reading about an unlovable hero whose day-saving seems completely incidental compared to him "bwahaha"ing all over the place.

Ryan Stegman's artwork is definitely something to marvel at (no pun intended). Although his rendering of "chronotons" screwing up time and space (I guess that's what was happening) make some of the panels feel a bit claustrophobic unnecessarily, he has a style that's just perfect for the 2099 environment. It actually makes you feel like maybe there could be an opportunity here to resurrect the old Spider-Man 2099. This story arc has been impressive and it could ended that way if Slott hadn't seen fit to cop out and once again leave the moral of the story being "Because I'm Spider-Man, bitch."

Bottom Line: I honestly thought there were enough unlovable jackasses on The Walking Dead that we didn't need to read about one in a Spider-Man comic. Sadly, I was mistaken. 7 out of 10.

Avengers #21: It's a fortunate thing that the Infinity event is coming closer to its end because there's only so many ways I can say "Goddamn, this is good shit!" Jonathan Hickman very clearly has a great appreciation for the sandbox of a universe he's been given to play in and it radiates off of every page whether it's a victory for the villains or a loss for the heroes.

This issue mainly deals with the aftermath of Thor's bold stand against the Builders and the liberation of Hala, the Kree homeworld. There are definitely things to like about how Hickman has handled this. For one thing, despite the fact that it's usually enjoyable to see the reverence alien civilizations show towards Captain America, I found it a nice change a page to focus on a character whose general opinion was "You know, that was kind of a dick move." Another great thing about this issue is the return of Captain Universe to the battlefield in a semi spectacular fashion. Some people don't like that there wasn't much of the actual Avengers in this issue, but I actually appreciate that. A theme that Infinity highlights well is that Earth and, by extension, the Avengers are not the center of the universe and when they are, it's usually not in a good way (this means you, Kanye West). There are characters in the galactic Marvel U who believe that Earth is the Wild West of space and will eventually lead to the whole of creation being wiped out probably by accident and that deserves some exploration, too. Also, there are too many non-Avengers that play a role in this story to not highlight them.

To the surprise of absolutely NOBODY, Lenil Francis Yu's artwork hits all the right marks here. The real treat here was the scene in which (minor spoiler...sorry) the Alliance lets loose the Annihilation Wave... goddamned Annihilation Wave upon an almost victorious Builder fleet.  You have to appreciate Yu's penchant for crafting a good "holy shit" moment.

Bottom Line: If you want an Avenger focused book, it might feel out of place, but this is still really good sci-fi storytelling. 8 out of 10.

Stuff I Read This Week Episode 28 or Maybe DC Will Give Kanye and Kim A Comic.....

Batman #24: As much as I disliked the idea of yet another origin story for Batman (as if there haven't been plenty already), Scott Snyder has managed to breathe new life into the Dark Knight's beginnings, giving us a much different Bruce Wayne than we're used to. Over the years, we've grown used to a young man who wasn't terribly youthful in the wake of his parents' death. Zero Year gives us an brash, impulsive hero who is far less premeditated than the once we've come to know. What Daniel Craig and Casino Royale did for the James Bond mythos is what Snyder has done for Batman here.

This issue (mostly) wraps up the threads of the first story arc that has been mainly dedicated to Batman's one man war against the Red Hood Gang. Some reviewers haven't liked Red Hood One as an opening foil for young Batman, but I think he's created the perfect dichotomy for the kind of reimagined origins Snyder wants to convey. A villain who seems to have the entire city under control through merciless resolve and meticulous plotting is the perfect challenge for a young, headstrong vigilante fighting like he has nothing to lose. At the same time, we also see Bruce learning the importance of creating a larger than life legend around his alter ego, something for cowardly and superstitious criminals to remember in the years to come.

Greg Capullo's pencils and Danny Miki's inking do not disappoint. Here we see a Gotham that resembles a flourishing city built on old money that hasn't quite had the chance to descend into madness just yet. The action scenes do a masterful job of lending themselves to the beginnings of a character creating a myth around himself. In the final ten pages, we also see a changing of the artistic guard with Rafael Albuquerque taking the helm on pencils, delivering a drastic but logical visual shift. The eerie, shady tones suit the change in narrative since we see a Gotham whose innocence is lost. In the birth of the Batman legend and the revelation of the necessity for Batman, there's no turning back for the people of the city. It's still a bit of a mystery what the end game of Zero Year is, but if we get more of what we've gotten so far, I'm in.

Bottom Line: A kinetic, exciting finish to an immensely fun story arc. 9 out of 10.

Infinity #4: We're past the halfway point of Marvel's big crossover and here in the fourth issue (of six), we finally see a turning point of sorts for our heroes. After four issues of the Avengers, the Galactic Council and Black Bolt barely holding their own against the seemingly insurmountable Builders and the mad titan Thanos, surviving through Trojan Horse scenarios and retreats, it's a welcome change of pace to see them (two characters in particular) making definitive stands, drawing lines in the proverbial sand in the fight for Earth. We also finally get a brief insight into the motivations behind the Builders' campaign through the universe. It's not quite as satisfying as what we've come to expect from Jonathan Hickman, but it serves as a decent enough explanation to keep us reading until their goals (I'm assuming) unify with those of Thanos. Also, without spoiling anything for you, this week in awesome.....Thor. I'm just going to leave that there. This issue does a much better job in offering a more comprehensive chapter that doesn't seem to need tie-ins as a supplement. HOWEVER, as I've said before, if you're not reading the corresponding issues of Avengers and New Avengers, you are missing out on some quality goddamned superheroing. After the revealed fallout of Black Bolt's actions in issue three, it's going to be interesting to see a). where New Avengers goes from here and b). the ramifications throughout the Marvel Universe as a whole.

The artwork here is still as strong as it's been throughout the series. Dustin Weaver and Jerome Opena are still delivering quality work on their respective fronts (Opena does the scenes in space while Weaver handles those that take place on Earth). Although the scenes in the hidden Inhuman city are gorgeous, the real standout treat here is how Opena depicts Thor's defining moment so far in the event. If your jaw isn't on the floor when you see one of the final pages, you don't love comics.

Bottom Line: The respective threats on Earth and in space shouldn't feel so divorced this late in the game, but still....Jonathan Goddamn Hickman strikes again. 8.5 out of 10

Superman/Wonder Woman #1: Superman and Wonder Woman being a power couple in the DC Universe is one of the most half-assed, unnecessary publicity stunts DC has ever pulled. And considering the fact that they've completely rebooted their universe at least three times now, that's saying something. There's no real point because, from what I can tell, NOBODY cares. I dare you to name three people you know that bought the issue of Justice League specifically because they heard the news that these two heroes were going to hook up. DC has gone from assuming that all of their readers are perverted 40 year old men to assuming that they're all tweens who read the Vampire Diaries.

So, of course, in the fallout of their biggest non-event, they have to squeeze a spinoff out of it the way television does everytime a Kardashian does something (or someone) else nobody cares about. Sure, there's a handful of action involving a villain that hasn't done anything of real mention since the 90s, but you have to first sit through Wonder Woman having girl talk about what a wet blanket Superman is and Clark Kent playing Bloggerman. Then, there's Clark and Diana having a date. The prevailing problem here is obvious. There is NO CHEMISTRY between these two to speak of. Their date even feels like two celebrities having lunch together as a publicity stunt very much like Kim Kardashian's month long marriage. Charles Soule is great with character development and building the contrasts between the two of them, but the whole thing is so clearly a force-fed stunt for visibility, Ryan Seacrest may as well be standing off in the distance on a red carpet asking them who they're wearing.

On the plus side, artist Tony Daniel's work looks fantastic. With the sort of costume he wears, the color palette and the size of him, Superman tends to dominate the panels they share, but Daniel draws a damn good looking Wonder Woman who occupies the happy medium between warrior and royalty. He manages to make her look like Superman's equal while still maintaining a very feminine look for her. My main complaint is the costume. For the most part, it looks really good, but why is she in HEELS again??? With the fighting she does in this issue, it just feels awkward and out of place.

Bottom Line: Despite being a good looking book, it doesn't do a very good job in dwarfing how unnecessary this hookup and, ultimately, this title actually are. 6 out of 10.

Stuff I Read This Week Episode 23 or Can We Please Have a Thor/Ted Nugent Team Up?

Infinity #1: For all intents and purposes, Marvel readers SHOULD be suffering from a little jet lag as far as company wide crossovers are concerned. Especially after Age of Ultron. The argument could be made that it's a little soon to throw fans into another event right after AoU's massive letdown ending. Ask a boxer how ready he is to get back in the ring after he's been clobbered. Seriously, wake Manny Pacquiao up and ask him. I'm pretty sure he's still on the floor. However, that may not be a reason sufficient enough to write off Infinity.

In recent years, Marvel's trend has been to have events be chain reactions of one another. "Civil War among heroes caused the world to infiltrated by aliens which allowed Green Goblin to rise to power which brought Captain America back to kick his ass which blah blah blah blah....." Infinity comes across feeling like it has a completely different identity than that. This is largely thanks to Jonathan Hickman's style of crafting stories on an epic sci-fi scale. His work on The Avengers and New Avengers (which have been the primary books building toward Infinity, by the way) are a perfect indication of why his writing is what it is. Every moment in a Hickman book feels like whatever's happening is for all the marbles which is what the Avengers always be about anyway. Even the little things like the ominous fly pages in between beats give you the distinct feeling that you're about to have your mind blown. Infinity is no different in this regard.

This book touches on pretty much all of the important points from Hickman's Avenger stories. The "Illuminati" has been doing top secret, fucked up things for the good of all (again), the "Builders" have been going from world to world doing quite the opposite of building things and....oh, yeah, Thanos is ready to start some shit with Earth again. It's going to interesting to see what a pure science fiction voice such as Hickman's can do with the concept of an ascended beings whose business is "evolving" sentient races. It's not the first time we've seen this kind of thing, but he gives us enough to lead us to believe it's headed somewhere awesome. Jim Cheung's pencils are absolutely gorgeous. This is evident because of a particular page detailing a world being razed that is just one of the best "we've come to destroy all" scenes I've ever looked at.

One drawback that presents itself here is that, being the result of things that happened in at least three different books, Infinity isn't the easiest to jump into. However, if you like grand events and have grown tired of DC's Trinity War (which I'm almost certain is being written with the help of 12 sided dice and a Mad Libs book), this is certainly something to pick up.

Bottom Line: You may have to do a little homework to catch up, but this event is superhero shit done well. 9 out of 10.

Thor: God of Thunder #11: This is a book that flew below my radar for far too long. Thor's stories in the past have, for a long time, been a bit ambiguous with their handling of the character, not really giving him an identity aside from him being the Avenger who talks in "thee" and "thou." But I dare to say that Jason Aaron's run so far is going to end up being one of the essential runs they talk about in ten years when someone wants to get into Thor but doesn't know where to start.

In this issue, we get a fitting ending to the "Godbomb" and with that, an end to the saga of Gorr, the God Butcher. The Son of Odin was given a time bending, universe spanning problem to deal with, challenged just like a god should be and that challenged answered in epic turn. One theme that presented itself quite often in this story questions the existence of gods, whether or not they do more harm than good and whether they truly deserve to preside over man. Eventually, Aaron's villain, Gorr has a god slaughtering good times making the characters wonder if perhaps his quest is somehow, in a macabre way, justified. Now, it could be argued (and has been by the idiots at IGN) that what we're given is something of a cop out in favor of giving the Thunder God a happy ending. One thing to keep in mind...and this is something IGN couldn't be bothered to remember...is that Thor, despite being noble, determined and a decent judge of character, has NEVER been a philosopher in any sense of the word. Asking comic book character, especially one like Thor, for an insightful answer to a question that real life civilizations have pondered, fought and died trying to answer since forever....that's like asking Ted Nugent, well, anything. The only thing that would have made me happier is if he looked Gorr directly in the face and said, "Because I'm Thor, bitch."

Esad Ribic spared no creative expense while wrapping this arc up in style. The pencils here lend the sort of jaw dropping gravitas a story of this magnitude deserves. There are more than a few moments in this book that look like they should have come out of a mythic tome somewhere. Every time Thor used his hammer, your reaction should be nothing less than "Oh, shit! Are you serious?"

Bottom Line: An awesome, gorgeous ending to the kind of legendary arc that Thor deserves. This is a frontrunner for "Best Goddamned Comic Out This Week" and considering Saga came back this week, that's saying something.

9 out of 10.