And Then There Was Stormwatch.....

Honestly, I'm not a huge fan of injecting outside properties into another established canon, so I was ready to not be a huge fan of Grifter, Voodoo and Stormwatch showing up in the DCU. Therefore, I was ready for Stormwatch #1 to possibly suck. The first issue of this series introduces the team consisting Jenny Quantum, Jack Hawksmoor, the Engineer and Martian Manhunter alongside three brand new characters including one called the Eminence of Blades (they're really running out of names). This incarnation of is part of an organization that has protected Earth in secret for centuries. They don't believe themselves to be superheroes, but prefer the term "professionals." It's a thin premise as far as ironing these no nonsense protagonists into the fold, but it serves its purpose.

Here's my problem: the purpose it serves simply doesn't work. Stormwatch (basically the Authority) could NEVER exist in the same space as the Justice League. They'd spend 30 pages a month at each other's throats instead of getting sh** done. It'd be like Congress...or my parents. The League would find Stormwatch to be excessive and just like Stormwatch would probably think the League is a bunch of pussies. Except Batman...because he thinks EVERYONE'S a pussy. DC is a universe built on archetypal superheroes. They're the standard. They don't need to be edgy and that's not what anyone really reads DC for, so it's redundant to have a bunch of tough guys come in and call the Superfriends lightweights.

Be all that as it may, this is still a halfway decent book. Cornell does the best he can with the task he's been given. It's not quite action packed, but there's enough of a balance between action and exposition to keep the story progressing. The best part of this for me is that the first Big Bad is the Moon...the evil talking Moon. That's just f**kin awesome. Sepulvelda's artwork makes every look like they're staring into the Sun with a lot of squinting that's supposed to look like hardcore faces. Stormwatch is passable read until the Justice League makes an appearance in the book to kick their asses and remind them whose house it is. Bottom Line: Sloppy yet salvageable artwork, balanced pace, thin crossover premise, but great potential...just not now. 6.5 out of 10.

Action Comics #1

            So when DC talked about rebooting its entire continuity, I immediately treated the thought of reading certain titles with a mild neglect. Honestly, there are just some books that you know are such a cash cow for the company, you know they're a). not going to change much, b). not going to change anything major and c). not going to change anything for long. Superman has always been guilty of this very pitfall. He could decide to walk across America talking to people, die, denounce his American citizenship, grow a mullet (no, seriously...that happened), become a being a pure electricity for no apparent reason and it will be awesome for about six to eight months. This is mostly because the new writer will forget everything Kal-El learned, endured and survived and replace it with his/her better idea that will be even more awesome....for about six to eight months. Put simply, DC Comics treats Superman like Dory from Finding Nemo. I said all that to say I had every intention to skip Action Comics #1, but Grant Morrison's writing the book so I gave it a shot figuring I'd either hate it enough to spend a blog entry railing against whatever he's smoking this month or love it enough to want whatever he's smoking this month.

       Action Comics takes place five years in the past, chronicling what seems to be the Man of Steel's early adventures as the protector of Metropolis. Ok, I know how you people are about me giving things away, but I'm just going to come out and say it. Work boots, a Superman tee shirt, a cape and boot cut blue jeans come together to equal to the worst costume I've ever seen. I'm sorry, I don't mean to be nitpicky, but any given hero's uniform should, at least be a little more inventive than that of the schizophrenic that rides my bus to work in the morning screaming about Martians while smelling of Colt 45 and discarded coffee filters. This is not your father's Clark Kent. It's really not even your older brother's Clark Kent. Although he's fairly self assured, old fashioned like you're used to and quickly gaining control of his abilities, he's headstrong, he comes home to his hovel of an apartment, pats his landlady on the forehead and makes silk thin excuses about why he looks like he's been kicked in the face by Optimus Prime all while using his dual identity to help him in his career at a respectable newspaper (sound like another superhero you know?).

          Most of the supporting characters are as they always have been. Lois Lane is tenacious although tunnel minded and misguided, Jimmy Olsen is...following Lois, Sam Lane wants to kill Superman for saving people and Lex Luthor wants to help him do it (kinda). I'll say this: Morrison writes a damn good Lex. Much like in All Star Superman and Earth 2, he wrote a condescending, arrogant douchebag who treats life and people like a game of chess. There's also plenty of action here as Morrison allows Clark to cut his teeth taking on corrupt captains of industry and running (literally) from the cops. Rags Morales handles the kinetic pacing well although facial expressions leave a bit to be desired in the non action oriented beats. It's not quite as kooky as I expected from the guy who gave us Professor Xavier's evil twin, Batman's pompous douchebag son and whatever the hell he gave us in Final Crisis, but judging by the way this first issue ends, you can tell it's building towards something psychotic and indicative of the Grant Morrison we all know and love. Bottom Line: Nice art, fast paced action, decent (re)introduction of characters....a fun ride. 8 out of 10.

My First Foray Into the New 52: Justice League #1

           Okay, I should probably start this off with the obvious fact that I find the whole idea of DC rebooting their whole universe (for, I believe, a fifth time) to be stupid. It's the one trick they know so they just keep doing and it never sticks. Love it or hate it, there's a lot of hype around this initiative and the first book they trotted out is, of course, Justice League. Now, I'm not opposed to JL being rebooted because I've hated the title since Dwayne McDuffie (who will be missed...R.I.P.) was fired from writing it. For all intents and purposes, this should be DC's flagship title and Geoff Johns creates a feeling that it's what the book is going to be. In this incarnation, our heroes don't know each other and don't seem to trust (or maybe even like) each other either and the public seems to share this sentiment. There was a lot of focus on Batman and Green Lantern which gave it the feeling of a slightly edgier episode the Brave and the Bold cartoon. The back and forth dialogue between the two, introducing their personalities to us makes the book feel a little slow despite the action. We also get an introduction to another member of the team (pre-powered) whose purpose for being on the flagship team I've yet to figure out (probably because I've never been a fan of this guy). The thing that troubles me so far is that our superheroes don't really come across as heroes. It seems like a bunch of macho people getting dressed up to go looking for something to punch (some of whi.ch do so in the third person...ugh), only performing gestures to protect the status quo as an afterthought. Part of this is probably because of Jim Lee's decision to limit the emotional range of the  faces to frown and half smiles. All in all, the banter was fun, the action was acceptable, and Jim Lee did what Jim Lee does but the characters feel like they could soon become an attempt at competing with Marvel's Ultimate Universe....which is not what we read DC for. Not quite legendary, but a decent start. 7.5 out of 10.

P.S: about the cover...why does Superman look 17?